Move Over Indy, We Found the Ark

I was 6 years old when "Indiana Jones and the Raiders of the Lost Ark" came out. I don't have memories of seeing it in the theater, but I do remember it being one of the first videos we ever watched on our new VCR. I can still remember sitting in my grandparents living room engrossed by the images I saw before me. Like, who could ever forget the snake pit that Indy got lowered into? Yeah, probably why I still hate snakes to this day and why I scream "like a little girl" any time I cross paths with one in real life. If you're with me, holler, Amen!

I'm sure you're thinking that this is an absurd way to start a blog but actually I got thinking about this back on Sunday. Hats off to Pastor Mike Lauridsen who filled the pulpit Sunday at Parkway Wesleyan. He did an amazing job and what he had to share about the ark; not the ark from Indiana Jones, but rather the Ark of the Lord, really got me thinking.

Pastor Mike shared how the Ark had three things inside: the golden jar of manna - representing God's provision; Aaron's staff - representing God's power; and the 10 Commandments - representing God's presence. He related that to the Israelites crossing the Jordan under the leadership of Joshua and how it wasn't until the Ark was carried into the Jordan that the waters stopped and the Israelites crossed over on dry ground. In that great scene, God was demonstrating everything represented by the Ark - His power, His provision, and His presence.

As those very words were still hanging in the air, God began to speak to my heart and my mind began churning. Pretty soon we are going to be celebrating, who God is and what He's done, in a new country. And the reality that's unfolding around us is that the Ark of the Lord is in the midst of our "Jordan River." I can't fully explain it, but what we've seen happening around us these past two months is nothing short of miraculous. Our financial partnerships, if you can in fact help us hit 60% by month's end, will have doubled in a two-month period. Are you kidding me - how does that happen? Only through a miraculous God who chooses to use obedient children who are in love with Him and on fire with His mission to reach the entire world with the love demonstrated through the sacrificial death of His one and only Son, Jesus Christ.

And here's the further reality...we've heard a lot about safety and about the boys' and about their schooling and about a whole lot of other things, and I don't mean any disrespect, but here's what God showed me on Sunday. It is only as we follow God through the river that we have any certainty of His provision...of His power...and of His presence. There is no turning back for the V-Team. There is no surrender. There is no retreat. We must follow the Ark of the Lord into the river if we are to arrive at the Promised Land, which for us is Central America.

From the bottom of our hearts we want to thank each and every one of you who has stood beside us in some way this past year plus. You have not given up on us or on God. You have encouraged us and you have inspired us. Thank you for continuing to believe with us in a God who still parts the waters! The only question I leave you with is this: where is the Ark of the Lord leading you? For it is only there that you too will find His provision, His power, and His presence. Together, let's follow with all we've got!

Have You Lost Your Mind?

I can't even begin to tell you how many times I heard that phrase as a child growing up; Barry, what have you lost your mind? Whether it was the time I tried to take my favorite candy from my sister's room. Would've gotten away with that one had my sister not come out of the bathroom right when she did. Or whether it was the time my cousin and I mixed up cleaning chemicals and tried to transport them to his house (to see what further chemicals he had) in an Entenmann's cookie tin. Not sure if it was the seeping backpack that we tried to conceal it in or the horrendous odor, but mom knew as soon as we hit the kitchen doorway. Both times the same, "Have you lost your mind?"

Though I'm some 30 years or so removed from those scenarios, this question still follows me around. "You're leaving 11 years of pastoral ministry for the mission field? Have you lost your mind?" "You're selling almost everything you own or giving it away? Have you lost your mind?" "You're moving out of the parsonage and are going to be homeless? Have you lost your mind?" "You're uprooting your family to another country? Have you lost your mind?" "You're completely trusting God with everything? Have you lost your mind?"

If I'm being honest with you, there have been many times where I felt as if I had lost my mind; when none of what we're doing made any sense whatsoever. There was an entire season where I secretly hoped our journey was going to be consistent with the Abraham of Genesis 18 and not the Abraham of Genesis 12. You know, that our willingness to sacrifice everything we held dear would be enough and that at the last moment God would provide a "ram caught in the thicket" - a way out. However, I've come to fully embrace the Genesis 12 version of our life that God has asked us to leave everything behind (to sacrifice it all) and that he is indeed leading us to an entirely different place.

But I guess that's the thing: when did following God's will have to equate to making sense? Did it make sense for Noah to start building an ark? Did it make sense for Moses to return to the country where they wanted him dead? Did it make sense for Abraham to leave his entire family and life behind to follow God? Did it make sense for the disciples to leave their jobs and families to follow Jesus? And we find this repeated all throughout Scripture.

So, I guess we have lost our minds. But I hope we've also lost our bodies...and our hearts...and our very lives to the cause of Jesus. For only in losing the entirety of who we are may we be found in Him.

Out of the Darkness and Into the Light

You may remember this picture from our January newsletter. In that newsletter I (Barry) wrote briefly about my journey over this past year and the dark, desert-like struggle that it has been for me. I also alluded to the fact that I would talk about that in more detail in an upcoming Blog post. I first sat down to write that in March, yet I finally feel like this is the time.

These past 3 months have been incredible for me. I have been experiencing the most freedom and joy in my relationship with Jesus than what I can remember for a long time. I believe that with God's help and Christy's patience, I have finally "come out of the darkness and into the light."

A lot has been made about the difficulty for me of transitioning out of the pastorate; if you read an earlier Blog of mine, it really was like a death for me. However, to put the entirety of this dark season on that move alone would be not only a gross over statement but also something entirely inaccurate. Did the transition out of pastoral ministry contribute to the darkness? Certainly, but there was so much more to it.

In looking back now, I realize that this past dark, desert experience was not something outside of God's plan for my life, but was exactly spot-on right in the middle of it. I realize now that what God has been accomplishing in my life was something that I obviously did not allow him to accomplish while in the pastorate and probably would not have allowed him to accomplish on the ground in Central America. I realize now that only by leading me to the desert could God do the work in me that he needed to do. And I'm not just talking about getting me ready for the mission field. I'm talking about making me the kind of husband to my bride that she deserves; the kind of father to my boys that they deserve; the kind of Christ follower to the world that it needs.

You see, you can't be those things when there is unconfessed and undealt with sin in your life. You can't be who you need to be when you are at the center of your own world and seek to control everyone and everything. You can't become who Jesus needs you to become when your view of yourself isn't anything even close to Jesus' view of you. And yet that was the man I saw every time I looked in the mirror. But thanks be to God, that is no longer the man I see!

The Bible says that God disciplines those he loves and right in the middle of the desert God showed up and broke me; He broke me of me and I will never be the same. There were so many different ways that God met with me during this time (His presence, His Word, a counselor, sermon videos, worship songs, great friends, a loving wife, and the list goes on). And yet as undeserving and unworthy of it all as I was, I'm so incredibly humbled and thankful for those who continue to stand by my side.

No one ever asks for the desert; I know I didn't. Yet I stand here today to let you know that if you allow it, you can enter the desert dying, yet come out fully alive; you can enter in the darkness, yet come out in the light.

Hidden until it is time for McFarland

After almost a full week of being snowed in at our friends home (while we house sit for them) our family ventured out to school, dinner and a Friday night movie. Barry had selected the movie saying it would be a good one for our family. So, I naively followed his lead.  

Standing under the display of movie choices my heart broke at the choices we were presented with. My thoughts and heart went to prayer thinking about the many men and women who walk naively (or purposefully) into the movie theaters and have their minds filled with images and words that are contradictory to the heart of God. 

I had no idea how the Lord was going to this movie experience to change my perspective.

We entered our empty theater, found our seats and began watching people file into the theater.  Barry shared with me several ministry phone calls he made and we briefly reflected on how it appears that God is bringing some new partners to our team (YEAH...Praise the Lord).  

Towards the beginning of the movie, "McFarland, USA" (which I will not ruin for you but definitely think you should go see), I was greeted with a familiar sound that quickly transported me to Guatemala...where my mind remained for the entire movie, that of a rooster crowing.  Although the setting of the movie was in McFarland, California, the images, sounds and people reminded me of my experiences in Guatemala and the yearning I have to return to Central America.

My family has been in a lonely and bizarre chapter of life. A chapter that we may title: Hidden. As we have changed our ministry focus from local pastoral ministry to global ministry we have experienced changes in relationships which make us feel as though we are hidden from the relationships we once loved. Changes in how we serve which have made us sense a need to hide the passions that are on our hearts. Changes in the address we call home which has hidden us from the neighbors and life we were comfortable with. Changes in our finances which have forced us into completely hiding in the arms of the Lord's provision. Changes in how we are fed spiritually where we find ourselves hiding in the faithfulness of Holy Spirit. We have wrestled with our purpose and our value during this chapter in our lives.  We have experienced more valleys and trials than we can count. And have often found ourselves alone feeling like the Lord is hiding us. 

Strangely, I sat through the movie and for the first time in almost a year I found myself feeling at home. No, not at home in the movie theater.  Rather, at home with the culture of McFarland, at home with the story line of "McFarland,USA," and at home with the call the Lord has graciously given to me and my family.  At home and at peace.

I walked out of the movie theater ready to jump on a plane and head south (and not just because of the snow forecast for the weekend).  Ready to be at home out of the hiding. Ready to begin learning the culture and language.  Ready to leave "safe" and be home.

This morning I read a blog post written by Jo Saxton (a speaker that I am excited to hear share at the Alive 2015 Conference coming up in April).  Her blog collided with what has been on my mind about this chapter of life I find myself and my family in.

Check it out blog:

http://weare3dm.com/josaxton/we-are-3dm/on-calling-hidden-for-a-season/

Maybe, just maybe, Jesus is keeping me and my family hidden for a chapter of growth, preparation and renewal.  Maybe I need to change my perspective and trust this chapter of hiding.  

For the time being we will choose to remain (John 15:4) hidden waiting patiently until it is time for "McFarland".  Using this chapter to deepen our relationships with the Lord.  We are trusting in the faithful, merciful, gracious, peaceful, just God; who will use this chapter of life for His glory, honor and praise.

Why Women Shouldn't...

One of the most awesome and thrilling moments, for sure of this transitional phase of life, and perhaps even of my married life, occurred less than two short weeks ago. As we sat on the bed together, Christy had just clicked the "register" button, signing herself up for her first class toward ordination. The journey to that point is quite a story in itself, one perhaps Christy herself may share at some later time.

I'm not sure what emotions your mind started conjuring up when you saw the title to this blog, "Why Women Shouldn't..." Perhaps you had feelings of curiosity; "I wonder where he's going with this?" Perhaps you had feelings of agreement; "I hope he talks about not working outside the home or not being in significant places of leadership." Perhaps you even had feelings of anger and frustration; "How's he going to tell a woman what they shouldn't do!" Yet, truth be told, I worded the title that way in an attempt to draw you in. Had I wrote out the entire title it would have said: Why Women Shouldn't Accept Less Than God's Best.

I am married to one of the most gifted and talented person on the face of planet earth (and no I'm not trying to kiss up - it's just the plain truth). Over the course of our 17 plus years of marriage, I've watched her blossom into who she is today; which by the way, doesn't even compare to who she'll be tomorrow and in the days to come. I've watched her grow and flourish as she has provided invaluable leadership and mentorship in our home, at her school, at the church where we served, as well as in the district in which we're still a part of.

And yet, as wonderful and capable a leader as she is, the world was almost kept from the future Rev. Christy Van Steenburg (again, the "why" goes back to the journey to get here). I don't know exactly how Christy's ordination, and the process thereof, fits into God's greater plan for her, our family, and ultimately the Kingdom, but I can tell you one thing: I am so excited and blessed to watch it all unfold.

I am so proud of my bride for not accepting less than God's best for her. I am glad she didn't minimalize the call of God in her life to something less than what it really is. I am humbled by the thought that other women out there might be inspired and encouraged to step into God's best for them simply by being around Christy and hearing her story. If you're reading this blog and that's you, my prayer is that you would radically follow God's radical call on your life and that you would never accept anything less than God's best for you, whatever that might mean for you.

P.S. While this blog was written to brag on my bride and to share the grace of God in her life, so as to spread it to other women, this is a message for all of us, regardless of gender. Male or female, know this: God has an amazing plan for your life. Are you willing, whatever the challenge and whatever the cost, to fully pursue it with the same passion with which Jesus fully pursued you? Might we all, unequivocally, answer with a resounding, "YES!"

Barry